Daddy's Girl
by lambs79
Summary: Edward finds a baby girl abandoned at the hospital that he takes in as his own. This is how their lives change as they both live and grow. M for language, Eventual E/J slash in later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

Hi all! I am publishing the first chapter primarily because I really want to find a beta for this story. Let me know what you think, let me know if you can or are willing to help me out. If no one steps up, it will eventually go up, chapter by chapter, but maybe a little bit slower than my first story because I want to try to get things a little tighter on this one and if you all say it's stupid and horrible, then I'll take it down.

As always, I do not own Twilight or any of Stephanie Meyer's characters.

Also, despite the fact that I am writing Edward's ideas out of my own mind, his ideas are not all my personal beliefs.

Thanks for reading!

Daddy's girl

EPOV – September 2, 2010

I threw my bag over my shoulder and dragged my weary body out of the locker room.

Finally my thirty hour shift was coming to a close. And it wasn't a quiet shift either, as if there is ever one in the emergency department of a hospital. But working in the ED on a Saturday of a holiday weekend that also happens to be the first of the month in a city like Seattle is always crazy.

But now… I just need to sleep.

It may seem strange to most that it's 8:00 in the morning and my body is screaming for rest, but the only power nap that I was able to get at 2:00 in the afternoon yesterday has finally caught up to me as the adrenaline has subsided from my shift.

I wasn't even really paying attention to which direction I was going in; my body knew the shortest way to get me to a flat, comfortable surface.

I swung open the back door of the ED that is generally only used by staff and squinted against the natural light that flooded my vision.

Blinded, I dug around in the front pocket of my bag to find my pair of glasses as I took my first steps forward into the city air.

Today was Sunday, the second of September; it was still hot and humid. The sun was out now, but clouds could quickly move in. It would most likely rain today, but then it rained most days in Seattle anyway.

I hadn't made it five steps down the ramp towards the street when I kicked a large cardboard box lying on the ground.

I squinted and stared down at the box in my fatigue induced haze.

The box was stuffed with towels and blankets, but the delivery service that usually supplies linens to the hospital never left boxes at this doorway because they have access to the laundry room. Also they would never leave a box of mismatched, dirty towels such as these.

I shook my head, opened my eyes and looked again.

And I saw it.

There was a tiny face present amidst of the chaos of the large box. All I could see was the face as the rest of what appeared to be a baby was covered in old towels and sheets.

I could see her little bow shaped mouth and her eyes were closed. A shock of dark hair was on the top of her head.

And my body reacted.

I surveyed the area, no one else that I could see had noticed this misplaced box on the hospital doorstep.

I scooped the tiny child out of the box and quickly observed for any signs of life. The child was warm, breathing, and alive. I noticed the child had no clothes and it was a little girl. She couldn't have been more than a day old.

Quickly, I wrapped her in a blanket that I plucked from the box and bundled her the best that I could.

I watched as eyes fluttered and lips pursed. She was probably hungry.

I couldn't carry her and the large box back through the door that I had come, so I forgot my immense fatigue and went back the way that I had just come.

Few heads turned as I walked through the halls with the bundle to the emergency department until I tracked down Dr. Carmen Denali.

She was the pediatric attending in the ED tonight.

I found her at the desk, sitting at a computer, most likely reviewing records of a child currently behind a curtain. I called her name as I walked briskly towards her.

She did not look towards me from her work, but responded, "Cullen. You aren't supposed to be back here until 7:00 Wednesday night."

Ahh. Yes. I was supposed to get almost 48 hours of uninterrupted rest, but my mind wouldn't rest as it was supposed to until I cared for the tiny infant in the crook of my arm.

I adjusted the little girl so when Dr. Denali looked up, she would not be missed as I spoke, "Yes, Doctor. I was just on my way out, but I found _her_ in a box near the staff entrance. It's a female, approximately 12 to 24 hours old. Estimated full gestation."

Finally Dr. Denali's attention was on me and the tiny baby girl, as was every other nurse's, technicians and clerk's within hearing distance.

Every hospital is known as a safe haven to take children who cannot be cared for, but finding a baby in a box from an unknown source was certainly not a common occurrence around here.

Dr. Denali quickly stood and moved around the desk to take the baby from my arms.

She glanced towards Tanya, a nurse on the unit who was standing close by, and they moved in tandem towards a pediatric emergency room.

Quickly they had taken a full set of vitals and I was relieved that the baby seemed health thus far. We all shook our heads when we realized that the umbilical cord was tied with a shoelace.

Tanya gently cleaned the child with a soft cloth.

As soon as we were sure that the child was safe and healthy, Dr. Denali agreed that the child was hungry and Tanya procured a bottle from the pantry down the hall.

She mixed the formula and was just about to feed her when I called out, "Stop! I'll do it."

I don't know what had overcome me and I believe both Dr. Denali and Tanya had forgotten my presence during their assessment.

Dr. Denali waved me off and told me to go home and get some sleep, but despite what I was feeling not even a half hour before, sleep was the furthest thing from my mind at this moment.

They shrugged and allowed me to cradle the baby and feed her. She was hungry. She had finished the first bottle within 5 minutes. I checked with Tanya and was able to give her the second bottle, however I had to remove her latch occasionally to help pace her feeding so she wouldn't vomit it all up and have to start again.

Soon enough, the tiny girl in my arms was sated and full. Her body sagged into sleep as I cradled her.

I laid her down in the hospital bassinet and left the room.

I quickly found Dr. Denali speaking to an officer a few feet down the hall and two maintenance workers carrying the light, but bulky box through the main entrance of the ER, as I doubt the box would have fit through the side entrance easily.

When Dr. Denali looked up again and met my eyes, she waved me over.

"This is Dr. Edward Cullen," she introduced me to the officer who she was speaking to, "He found the child out back."

"Officer James Cove," he introduced himself, "Did you see anyone or anything suspicious in the area?"

I shook his hand briefly before explaining the series of events that had brought us to this place within the half hour.

He took notes as I explained the situation stating he will have to write an official report regarding the child and will take the box to be examined for any evidence as to where the child belongs.

"Thank you, Officer," Dr. Denali finished as she shook his hand.

As he stepped out of the door, Carmen turned towards me. With a stern, but maternal look, she clipped, "Go home, Cullen."

"But-,"I started.

"Home," she demanded. There was no arguing.

My shoulders sagged as I acquiesced to her demand. I glanced toward the room where the little one lay and whispered, "What will happen to her?"

A tight smile appeared on Carmen's lips before she responded, "Are you sure you don't want to specialize in pediatrics, Cullen?"

I shook my head briefly, I couldn't.

"We already called the Department of Social and Family Services. There will be an investigation as to her birth parents I'm sure, but for now she's staying here. She's dehydrated and a newborn so we are admitting her for observation for 24 to 48 hours until DSF finds her a place to go," Dr. Denali responded.

Satisfied that the little girl that had already started wrapping her tiny fingers around my heart would not disappear into the night and she would be well cared for by my colleagues, I walked out the front door of the ED this time into the street.

I only lived two blocks away from the hospital in a tiny one bedroom apartment. I could have afforded something bigger in a nicer area of the city, but it's not like I was home most of the time anyway. I just needed a place to sleep.

On the short walk, the words of Officer Cove and Dr. Denali swirled through my head like a hailstorm.

They would investigate who her birth parents are. But I already made up my mind, anyone that could just leave their newborn baby in a box on the street didn't deserve this angel calling them "mom" or "dad". They didn't deserve the precious tiny life that I was forced to leave back in the hospital.

A social worker would most likely come by in the morning and would eventually whisk her away to a foster family where she may stay for a few months until the next placement was made. How many places would this child call home before she was a year old?

Before I knew what I was doing, I whipped my iPhone out of my pants pocket and I was dialing.

"Hello, sweetheart. They have freed you from the hospital? When are you going to come over for dinner? " I heard through the phone before I could get a word in edgewise. Of course my mother would be awake and cheerful at this time of day. She was always a morning person and in her book, half of the day had been wasted if you slept in past daybreak.

"Hi, Mom," I responded, "Yes, I worked all weekend and I'm back in on Wednesday. I'm on my way home now."

"Oh, sweetie, you sound exhausted. Make sure you go home and have a glass of orange juice, then go right to bed," she responded. Of course her answer for whenever we weren't feeling well whether it was fatigue or chicken pox or a cold was orange juice. And this woman was married to a doctor, not to mention me, her son.

But this wasn't why I called.

Biologically, I was the only child of Carlisle and Esme Cullen. After I was born, my mother had complications including a massive amount of blood loss and could not have any more children.

This is where Rosalie, Emmett, and Alice came into the picture.

At any given time growing up there were no fewer than six children running around my house. I had automatic friends and playmates, but most were only there temporarily until the state took them to another home or allowed the children to return to their parents.

All of them left except for my brother and two sisters.

I was six when Rosalie came. She was eight and a half and a bitch. Already in second grade she had no problem telling her teachers exactly what she thought about their class or just skipping altogether. However when my parents found out, they insisted on driving her to school, dropping her off in class and giving her extra writing assignments until she learned to do the work. She eventually learned to accept and respect my parents when they put their foot down, but she never really calmed down until Emmett came.

Emmett came a year after Rosalie. He was a few months older and class clown. I don't like to admit how many times he put my hand in a bowl of warm water while I was sleeping. My parents quickly realized he needed a healthy way to burn off all of his extra energy and enrolled him in any and all sports teams they could find throughout the year.

Alice came when I was ten, she was eleven, but really only older than me by five months. When Alice first came, she was quiet, withdrawn. It wasn't until I helped her get rid of Lauren, the school bully, that she started to open up to me. Alice would climb into bed with me at night sometimes and we would whisper secrets. Her parents heard voices. They killed themselves as well as the family pet. They called for her too, but she was able to hide her tiny frame in the closet until they gave up looking for her.

"Mom," I said into my phone. Of course she was still rambling about this or that, I wasn't paying close enough attention to exactly what.

Finally, she paused to take a breath, "Mom, I need your help."

I explained to her the situation and she listened intently before sighing, "Sweetie, I'd love to help, but we haven't had a baby here for ten years, and certainly not a newborn. Do you know the kind of time it takes to take care of a newborn? Two a.m. feedings and diaper changes."

I knew my mother, I could argue, but I kept quiet.

She continued, "We don't have a crib or a changing table. Oh – I must call Alice so we can redecorate the spare room. I'll call you back, Dear."

I smiled to myself knowing she just talked herself into helping the tiny little girl.

I found myself standing in front of my apartment building when Mom hung up on me. I unlocked the doors, said hello to Irina, my neighbor and was asleep within moments of walking into my apartment.

*DG*

I woke still dressed in my scrubs and sprawled over my navy blue comforter.

Staring at the ceiling, I went over everything that had happened this past weekend in my mind, the child being foremost. I wondered if they had made any progress as to where she was from or where she was going. A part of me hoped that they would find her birth parents so that I could beat them to a bloody pulp for abandoning their child. I was never a violent person, but to leave your baby in a cardboard box is sickening. A larger part of me hoped they would stay away from her.

Finally, I stretched and glanced at my alarm clock next to the bed. It was almost midnight.

I rose from the bed and padded across the apartment to the kitchenette. I was an awful cook even though my mother tried to teach me, but I could make a mean cup of coffee. I grabbed the container from the freezer and plugged the device in, intent to get my fix. As I waited for it to finish dripping, I opened the refrigerator.

A bottle of ketchup and an old Chinese take-out container.

I would need food, but I'd worry about that in the morning. A Poptart would do for now.

When my coffee was finished and I was munching on a warm Poptart, I sat on the sofa staring blankly at the awful late night television.

So this is what my life has amounted to.

I know it's hard to have a great social life when you're working long shifts as a ER resident, but I hear others in the hospital discuss their great conquests after going out to the bars and clubs at night.

When I first started at the hospital, Lauren and Jessica followed me everywhere. When I went to grab lunch, they would be standing right behind me. I'd find them standing outside of the men's room. They just didn't get it. And they wouldn't have believed me if I told them.

So occasionally, I have to resort to drastic measures.

I had Emmett meet me outside of the hospital one morning after a shift. I didn't even need to turn around to see if the girls followed.

Now I am not the flamboyant type. I don't like Broadway musicals (except Phantom) and I can't dance.

As soon as I stepped out of the doors, Emmett came running up and swooped me into an enormous hug. Emmett wasn't shy, but if he wasn't my brother, I swear he would have planted one right on my lips, but even he has boundaries sometimes.

"Hi, honey," he said in his most suggestive tone.

"Hi there, handsome," I responded looking up at my muscular brother who stood four inches taller than myself, "You ready to go home?"

"Absolutely. You want top or bottom tonight?"

I just about choked on his suggestion. Did I mention that I'm also not an actor? But I half-turned and saw the girls less than ten feet away listening to every word we were saying with their jaws on the ground.

When I saw the looks on their faces, I glanced back up at my brother and responded, "You can ride me all the way home, cowboy. Come on."

I wouldn't say that I skipped home after that display, but I may have had an extra pep in my step. Emmett and I laughed and I treated him to dinner.

Yeah, I've been to most of the gay bars and clubs in the city at least once with friends, but it's just not my scene. I don't need to grind and fuck different faceless guys each night of the week and if I have to get shit-faced to do it, then the fuck wasn't that great to begin with.

Some people may call me a homebody. Some people may see me as a prude, but I don't care. Esme Cullen raised a son confident in himself. I was raised to be confident in who I am. There was never any embarrassment or hiding of who I am.

And up to this point, I was always confident in the direction of my life. I moved from the valedictorian of my high school to complete my undergraduate degree in three years, moving right to medical school and graduating with honors. Now I was third year resident in one of the best hospitals on the west coast.

But I had no one to share it with. I have had a few flings in the past, but no one that lasted. No one that shared my ambition and drive, so we had some fun, but we always ended up parting because we were missing something.

As I reflected more on the day that had just passed, I knew that I wanted to find a partner, someone that was more than just a good fuck or fling. I wanted to share my life with someone.

And I wanted a family.

My parents had adopted three children, there should be no reason that I couldn't do the same.

Slowly, the pieces started falling into place.

With a plan in mind, I found myself drifting off again.

This time I woke face down on the floor next to the sofa.

My eyes blinked open to stare up at the little pixie fluttering about my apartment.

"Alice," I groaned in my haze as I wasn't fully awake yet.

"Hello, little brother," she trilled, "it is a beautiful day and you've been cooped up in here for god knows how long. Good grief it stinks. What do you have in here?"

"Leave me alone, Alice. I've been working," I answered as I rolled onto my back and sat up against the sofa behind me.

"tsk, tsk, little brother. You know Mom called me last night and said you were bringing home a BABY! I couldn't believe that she said you had a baby, but she told me the whole story and we went right out and made sure we ordered a crib and a rocker, a stroller and a carseat, and anything else you might need. So get up! Get up, Edward so we can go see her."

Alice was speaking faster than my ears could hear, but she was pulled my arm and bouncing like the Energizer bunny so I reluctantly got to my feet.

Shaking my head I responded, "She's not my baby, Alice. I just found her and Mom found it in her plan that maybe she would be able to foster her for a little while."

Alice hadn't stopped bouncing as I talked, in fact she may have been moving faster. "Silly, of course she's your baby and Mom already called DSF to discuss placement. Now go get showed and dressed so we can go meet her. EEEEE!"

I swear Alice's squeals could break glass on a good day. I covered my ears until I was safely locked in my bathroom with the shower running that could just barely lessen the noise that came from my favorite sister.

I was finally able to scrub the hospital grime from my body as the hot water washed over me.

When I exited I found a full day's worth of clothes including boxer briefs and a cotton undershirt waiting for me just outside the door.

"Alice," I growled.

"Just put it on," she trilled from just outside my door.

There really was no use in arguing. I knew my tiny sister and she would win no matter what. Emmett had taught her young how to fight dirty.

But I had to chastise her anyway, "You know I CAN dress myself, Alice."

"Yes, but for an out and proud gay man, I wish you had a little bit of style than just blue and green hospital scrubs, " she responded.

I stepped out of my room wearing a soft green and blue striped cotton sleeve shirt with a pair of non-holey jeans that I didn't recognize from my previous collection. I was about to reach down for my sneakers until she just about threw a pair of blue chucks at my head.

I ducked, just missing the shoe that skimmed my shoulder before standing up to my full height which was a full foot taller than my sister.

She rolled her eyes at me and said, "Don't start with that, E. Just put those on and let's go. We're already late for her early breakfast. We'll have to get there soon to get there for her 10:30 feeding."

I glanced at the clock on the stereo and finally saw that it was just after 10:00 now. I had slept a lot longer than I thought.

Drawing my brows together it registered, "How do you know her feeding schedule, Alice?"

She skipped out of the door ahead of me saying, "You forget, Edward. I know everything!"

*DG*

We made it to the hospital in record time with Alice constant encouragement to "hurry up" because we don't want to miss her feeding time.

We entered through the main entrance and checked in to get Alice a name badge. She wouldn't be allowed in the neonatal unit without one.

I led her up the elevators to the seventh floor to where the maternity and neonatal unit was. I quickly introduced myself to the nurse who was sitting at the front desk and she allowed us through to see the baby.

I shouldn't have been surprised to enter and see my mother, but I was.

She was standing with the tiny girl in her arms and was surrounded my half of a dozen other people I didn't recognize.

They looked up as we entered.

"Edward," my mother said in what was supposed to be a subdued tone as to not startle the little one cradled in her arm.

She reached out with her free hand to grasp my arm and pull me further into the room in front of the strangers.

"Edward, this is Dr. Leah Clearwater and this is the pediatric team. Oh – and you just missed Officer Cove. What a pleasant gentleman, although he could use a bit of a hair cut in my opinion," she prattled.

I heard one of the young interns chuckle at her assessment as I leaned over slightly to kiss her cheek, "Hi, Mom."

I straightened up again and took in the tiny creature snuggled in the blanket in my mother's arms, "Hello, little one."

"Oh, Edward. She has to have a name now. When James was in he said they found a note in the bottom of the box that you found her in that said her name was Renesmee, but truly what kind of name is that for such a beautiful child," my mother said while scrunching her nose to make a face as she said the name.

My ears perked up when I heard there was new information with a note regarding the baby and I tuned out my mother again as I considered calling him to receive the news first hand, although I couldn't be sure that he would tell me since I have no relation to her.

"What do you think, Edward?" I heard my mother finish.

Oops.

I looked up to see my mother and all of the residents and interns staring at me intently.

"Umm – sure, Mom."

"Good then it's final. We'll call her Lilly," my mother summarized.

Just then, the nurse arrived with her 10:30 bottle.

My mother gave me the infant and she settled quietly in my arms. I held her like a football with her head elevated from her feet and offered the nipple to her lips.

Lilly quickly latched onto the bottle and we all watched enraptured by the little girl. She had only been in our lives for a matter of hours but she already owned all of our hearts.

I watched as she sucked softly, but hungrily from the bottle. Her eyes were open, unfocused as a newborn's would be, but I was convinced locked onto my face.

After she was finished I burped her and rocked the tiny girl in my arms until she slept.

I looked up to see my mother and sister staring at me with Lilly in my arms. They both held the same astonished, but loving looks on their faces.

My mother reached up to curl a stray hair from my brow before whispering, "I haven't heard you sing since you were a child. You have a lovely voice."

I hadn't even realized the notes I was humming that vibrated through my chest, the notes to a lullaby that I hadn't heard in twenty years.

The gentle words rose to my lips as I rocked the sleeping infant.

Hush, little baby, don't say a word,

Daddy's gonna buy you a mockingbird.

And if that mockingbird won't sing,

Daddy's gonna buy you a diamond ring.

And if that diamond ring turns brass,  
Daddy's gonna buy you a looking glass.  
And if that looking glass gets broke,  
Daddy's gonna buy you a billy goat.

And if that billy goat won't pull,  
Daddy's gonna buy you a cart and bull.  
And if that cart and bull turn over,  
Daddy's gonna buy you a dog named Rover.

And if that dog named Rover won't bark,  
Daddy's gonna buy you a horse and cart.  
And if that horse and cart fall down,  
You'll still be the sweetest little girl in town.

I looked down to see my little sister wiping a tear from her cheek as I send a tiny crooked smile down to her.

I took a small step forward to place Lilly back in the bassinet that was waiting for her and as soon as she was out of my arms, the ladies of my family threw their arms around me.

They knew just as well as I that my life had changed in a blink of an eye, I would never be the same again. All because of a box on our doorstep and the tiny little girl within.

My mother wrapped her arm around my waist and gently led me out of the nursery.

"Come on, sweetie," she urged, "Let's get you and my granddaughter out of here."


	2. Chapter 2

First, I want to thank everyone for your awesome support and reviews at the very beginning of this story. Like I said, it's not going to go up as fast as my previous story did, but I apologize for this extended wait for Chapter 2. I will do my best to not make the wait as long as this one. Thanks for your patience.

I also want to thank smorr4eva for agreeing to pre-read and give me some excellent suggestions and ideas to make the chapters more cohesive.

As always, I do not own Twilight or Edward.

Enjoy.

Chapter 2

EPOV– August 16, 2011

I unfolded my body from the front seat of my Volvo and stretched my exhausted limbs until I heard them pop.

Shortly after my parents took Lilly to their home, I made the decision to buy a car and move to a safer, more family friendly area of Seattle. This meant I was further from work, but I found a home that was twenty minutes closer to my parent's house, which is on the outskirts of Seattle. Whenever I leave the hospital, no matter how exhausted I am, I make sure to head right over to my parent's house to see the little girl who has captured all of our hearts.

As I stretched and willed my body to stay awake for at least another hour or two, I saw the front door open. My father stood in the doorway holding a wriggling little girl with brown pigtails. I could hear her babbles and squeals from my car.

My parents have been married for twenty-nine years. My father, Carlisle, says that the key to a healthy and long marriage is compromise, which is why he didn't argue when my mother came home last September with a baby girl in her arms followed by Alice and I, piled high with bags and boxes of goods that my mother and Alice insisted Lilly needed. I'm sure Carlisle could have used the same objections of late night feedings and stinky diapers that my mother had provided, but Esme saw her challenge and faced it with determination therefore he knew when Esme Cullen was determined there was no stopping her.

She walked into the house, placed the immaculately dressed Lilly in my father's arms, and introduced her as 'Lilly – our new granddaughter.'

If Alice is omnipotent, then Esme is a prophet

My father's eyes darted from Alice, to myself, and back again before he shrugged and stepped back to allow us in the hallway. He saw the light in his wife's eyes and he knew better than to argue with the woman who had raised countless children within these walls. Lilly was here to stay.

"Hi, Dad," I greeted as I moved into hearing distance of my father.

"Hello, son," he responded.

"Baba dadadadada," was babbled back at me as Lilly leaned precariously out of Carlisle's grasp until I took her and held her on my hip.

I kissed the top of her head and inhaled her incredible baby scent, "Hello, beautiful."

But of course, I moved too slow for the limited attention span of an eleven month old, and she leaned down attempting to tell me to put her down. I tilted her back to blow raspberries on her belly until I heard her tinkling baby laugh. As she caught her breath, I gently placed her on her feet. She took a moment to achieve her precarious balance before placing one foot in front of the other.

As she toddled down the hallway toward the kitchen, my Father and I followed.

"How are the changes going at the hospital," I asked in greeting. My father was the medical director at University of Seattle Medical Center.

He rolled his eyes and huffed, "These new healthcare guidelines are killing us. They want us to know every detail about what could be going on with a patient, but refuse to give us the time or practices for us to complete the consults that need to be done. Now the push is for us not to consult specialties, but we can't do an EMG without consult to neurology."

I nodded in understanding, but that was a huge relief of emergency medicine. We do what we need to do that will either allow us to discharge a patient or stabilized them for transfer to the ICU or a PCU floor. From there, they can worry about the finer details of what's going on.

As we turned the corner from the hall into the kitchen, we could see the rest of the open floor plan that allowed my parents the space and décor that they needed and enjoyed.

But now, the décor was covered with balloons, crepe paper, and paper lanterns.

I stopped and my jaw fell open. "wh-what,"I stuttered.

I took a step forward and removed Lilly from the wall where she was tearing paper and streamers from.

She huffed at me in indignation until I pulled a balloon down from the ceiling that she prompted attempted to put in her mouth.

I caught hints of the copper toned hair that was so similar to my own amidst the room overflowing with decorations. "Mom," I called, "What is all of this?"

Her head popped up from where she was concentrating on her work. "Oh, hi, honey," she greeted me. "We're just practicing."

Unfortunately, that only raised more questions than it answered. Practicing?

My father stood bedside me and shook his head. "She's been at this all day," he muttered softly.

"Practicing for what, Mom?" I was able to ask as I waded through the mountains of paper, latex, and Mylar.

"Oh, for Lilly's birthday party, silly," she responded in a tone that made me sound like the crazy one.

"But that isn't for two weeks," I tried to reason, but this was Esme. There was no reasoning at a time like this.

She shook her head and made some comment about the fact that you can "never be too prepared."

Shrugging, I moved towards the back door and decided to sit on the porch where I hoped to god that the disaster inside the family room had not expanded to.

I walked out back and sat down on one of the Adirondack chairs that lined the house.

I sat Lilly on my lap, as I'm sure my mother and sisters would kill me if I allowed her to crawl around in the frilly pink dress that she was currently wearing. It was likely more "practice" for the huge party they had planned a few weeks ago.

My father sat a few feet away.

"How did the inspection go," I asked.

My parent's home underwent annual DSF inspections; however this was the first time I found myself strictly involved in the process as they were the current guardians of Lilly.

My father shrugged, "Same as always. Esme has the house immaculate and guarded to a T. There isn't anything below four feet that Lilly could possibly reach that she shouldn't and now that she's starting to walk, we installed the gates around the stairs. We had the pool cover fixed, so unless she is able to unlock the gate, enter the pool house and reach the button to release the cover there is no way that she can fall in."

I nodded, confident that my parents would maintain custody of Lilly in the foreseeable future.

"James called too," my father continued.

Officer Cove was just as involved in Lilly's care as the rest of us were. He continues to work to find her birth parents so he can help bring justice for abandoning her on the street, but any further clues since they found the note in the box were limited.

"He is coming to the party with his wife in a few weeks. And he still has no further ideas about her birth parents."

I shrugged. I wasn't nearly as concerned about her biological parents as long as we were here to care and love the little girl.

We enjoyed the sun for a while and I played peek-a-boo with Lilly as she sat on my knees. When she became bored of that, I helped her down to crawl on the smooth surface of the deck.

Unfortunately, my hours had not greatly improved as I entered my fourth and final year of residency at Harborview. That meant I missed many of the significant milestones that Lilly had achieved: the first time she sat up, rolled over, crawled, and most recently, her first steps.

I was there the first few nights when she was cutting teeth. I crawled out of the spare twin bed in her room and cradled her with Orajel and iced pacifiers until she fell back into a fitful sleep.

I was a zombie walking back into the hospital the next evening with a mug full of coffee in each hand, but it was worth it knowing that I was there to get her through the worst of the pain.

Tonight, as most nights, I ate dinner with my parents, bathed the little girl and dressed her in soft cotton pajamas. I rocked and sang her to sleep until she was chasing rabbits in her dreams.

I laid her in her crib that my mother painted to look like a nest in the forest amongst the animals that were painted on the walls and strategically placed around the room.

I pressed a kiss to her head and walked out silently to find my parents whispering in the den.

I was just about to say goodnight, when my father called out, "Sit for a moment, Edward."

It was more of a demand than a request.

I sat on the edge of the sofa seat and looked towards my parents with eyebrows raised.

"We were wondering if you had given anymore thought to get your license to be Lilly's guardian," my mother stated directly.

I leaned back and combed my fingers through my hair. I should have guessed this was where she was going. They asked me countless times when they first took Lilly into their home, but since then I have become lost in our schedule of work then coming here to play before returning back to my own bed in my own home and finally starting the cycle again at the hospital.

I shook my head and heard my mother huff.

"It's not that I don't want her –," I started.

"Edward," my father cut me off, "We know you love her, but you also know that our intention was not to keep her. James hasn't made any headway finding her birth parents and at this point they may not come forward. She's a beautiful little girl and she will leave us sooner or later."

I pulled heavily on the roots of my hair as I considered my father's words, or what he didn't say. They have plans to retire within the next five years. During that time, if Lilly's biological family does not come forward she will be available for adoption. If she's adopted, I'll likely never see her again.

Could I live with that? The short answer is no.

The tiny baby that I picked up out of the box a year ago owns me. She's my life.

Although there is the fact that I have numerous strikes against me. My hands dropped to my sides and I shook my head again. "Of course I don't want that," I responded quietly, "But I'm a single, gay, male doctor who spends day and night at the hospital. There are probably dozens of families out there that are better qualified to take care of her."

"That's true," my father agreed. My head snapped up to stare at him with vengeance in my gaze. He was supposed to be convincing me otherwise. "But you are also the one person who has been here since the beginning. Any time you don't spend at the hospital, you are here spending it with her. Don't tell me you are here to spend the time with your mother and myself because we both know that isn't true. But she may not be able to say it, but she loves you. She doesn't settle to sleep for anyone else but you. If you aren't here, she'll fight her tired eyes until she can't for another moment. When she was ill, she clung to you and wouldn't go to your mother or myself."

Really? It was true that I couldn't get enough of Lilly. I couldn't dream of going home to sleep without seeing her first no matter how exhausted I was. When she was sick, I couldn't let her go, was it the same for her that she needed me there too?

Some of it made sense now that my father told me so.

When I met his eyes again, I saw love and patience. I nodded, "I'll call my lawyer in the morning."

A hint of a smile touched his eyes as he stood and patted his strong arm across my shoulders, "Good, that's all we need to hear tonight."

My parents walked me to the door and waved as I drove off.

I know I was exhausted a few hours ago when I entered, but now I was filled with an energy that was inexplicable. Was I nervous or excited? Was I happy or angry?

All of these emotions came pouring over me at once. Was I ready to be a father figure in Lilly's life? If I sat and thought about it, I already was. Guardianship and maybe adoption down the road would just make this official. Knowing that she could possibly call me "daddy" one day made me happier than I ever thought I could be, but there was another part of me that was angry that the decision to make that happen was not in my hands.

My family and close circle of friends were all wonderful and open minded. They knew it took a kind heart and love to make a marriage and a family, but I knew in the core of my soul that there were many more people in this world who did not believe as I did. There were those who insisted a man and a woman made a family. That a little girl needed a mother.

My little girl had a mother, an egg donor. She didn't want her. So where did that leave us? I hit the accelerator a little bit harder, pushing myself back in my seat as I sped down the road. I could be and I would be Lilly's father. I would be all she needed. The little girl sleeping in her forest of dreams would never want for anything… of that I could be sure.

*DG*

The next two weeks sped by.

My parents were pleased when I told them that Jason Jenks had started the paperwork for me to file for guardianship of Lilly.

I made sure that I had off the three days around Lilly's birthday.

I stayed the night before the party holding Lilly as she dreamt. She slept on my chest as I considered how my life had changed within the last year. I nuzzled her hair and inhaled the scent of her baby shampoo as I remembered the first time I held her in my arms.

She had grown so much since then.

Now she was walking a bit more confidently on her own two feet. And I felt confident that she was going to start talking soon.

She would walk up to my knee and stare up at me with intent in her eyes that felt like an unspoken conversation, and yet the words have yet to come.

I would pick her up to place her on my hip and speak to her in gentle tones.

I fell asleep on the cramped twin bed in her room despite my mother kept my queen sized bed in my childhood room in case I decided to stay.

I woke to fingers in my hair, my nose, my ears. I screwed up my face and growled quietly. I cracked one eye open and immediately closed it again.

My brother was sitting by the bedside with Lilly in his arms. He was showing her how to flick my ears with the tips of his fingers.

"I swear, Em," I growled, "Do it again and I'll take you down."

"Ah-ah-ah," he laughed, "Not in front of my girl Lilly, here."

He flicked my ear again and I hopped out of the bed faster than a bolt of lightning, took Lilly to place in her crib, and chased him out of the room, down the hall and stairs and outside. I managed to tackle him in the middle of the lawn, but we fought for dominance.

Until we heard our mother call, "Boys, not today. And Edward, put your shirt on."

It was that tone. The one that when you heard it, you automatically obeyed. I stood, brushing myself off and walked back up the steps into the house.

I placed a kiss on my mother's cheek muttering, "sorry, Mom," before moving up the stairs.

She laughed, knowing all was forgiven and responded, "Don't worry about Lilly this morning. Alice has her. Just get yourself presentable. People will be here at noon."

I glanced at the clock, it was ten in the morning. I had two hours to get ready, but I'm sure that Mom and Alice would make sure every moment of that time was used. Any excuse to throw a party, but this time I couldn't blame them. Our baby girl was a year old today. A year ago today I found her and called my mom to bring her home.

I jumped in the shower and made sure to scrub any grass stains away from my scramble in the front lawn. I dried off and tried to comb my hair into some manageable concoction, but as usual, it just did what it wanted.

I threw on some clean clothes and stepped out of the room.

I didn't get three feet before I heard her screech, "You're wearing that today? You can't let everybody see you in a pair of jeans and a Jaeger T-shirt, Edward. What happened to the yellow polo with the green stripe that matches your eyes? Today is important, Edward!"

"Ugh," I groaned, "I told you that I'm not going to wear yellow, Alice."

"I don't care, E. Go put it on," my tiny bossy sister said while pushing me back towards the room.

And of course there sitting in the middle of my bed was the shirt she was just speaking of paired with a pair of khaki cargo pants. At least she lets me have my sneakers.

With a sigh, I avoid further confrontation and change my clothes.

I sneak past Lilly's room only to find that she and Alice have disappeared and walk at a snail's pace down the steps as this day has already started off with annoying siblings ordering me around.

I walk the length of the house finding it empty. I peer out the sliding back door to find my parent's lawn completely transformed.

My mother is standing in the middle of it all directing the caterers, party planners, and hostesses where to go.

In the matter of hours, they managed to erect tents for shade, a small petting zoo in the corner and an inflatable bounce castle and a crocodile slide.

This was a children's paradise. And I hoped that there would be more than just Lilly here to play.

A few hours later I realized, I should have known better.

I think my mother invited every child under the age of ten to their house to enjoy the festivities, food, and games.

I greeted people from my hospital including Dr. Denali and her husband Eleazar who was the CFO for a large financial corporation in the city as well as Dr. Clearwater from pediatrics and her family. Tanya, Jessica and Lauren arrived later in the afternoon.

Despite I was sure it was Jessica and Lauren that spread the word across the hospital that I was gay, they never really stopped hitting on me. In fact, sometimes I wondered if my show with Emmett only made it worse. Like when Jessica intentionally dropped her pen on the floor in front of me and bent at the waist to pick it up. She turned and acted surprised to see me behind her. She looked me up and down obviously expecting a reaction from me but was sadly mistaken, even if I was interested she's not my type. I took a wide berth around her and continued on my way.

But today, I had to make nice because I was greeting everyone who entered my parent's home.

By the time I had directed our guests to the back patio for drinks and under the tent for food, I was exhausted. I wondered if I would be able to catch a break and hide upstairs for a few minutes, but of course my oldest sister had to track me down.

"Edward," she snapped, "Why are you sending everyone down to the porch for drinks. You know that they are under the tent with the food."

I was just about to defend myself when I heard an unmistakable cry.

I rushed off without an answer for my bitchy sister following the sound of the little girl in distress.

I found her in the arms of my brother standing a few feet outside of the petting animal pen. She was crying hysterically screaming, "No," and appeared to scratch my brother. He struggled to hold her, calm her, and avoid her tiny fingers if he could.

As quickly as I could I scooped her from his grasp and held her tight against my body so she couldn't kick or scratch. She knew me, but she continued to cry, "No, No, No," until it calmed slightly to change to "Da, Da, Da." I held her close to me and spoke to her softly until her cries were no more than a soft hiccup and a sniffle. She clung to my neck with all of her strength, not that I had any intention of letting her go.

Once she calmed, I looked up to see we had gathered a bit of a crowd. Carmen and Eleazar, my parents and siblings, James, and Victoria, Lilly's case worker all stared at the two of us as I cradled the tiny girl against my shoulder.

Emmett took a step forward and said quietly, "Sorry, Edward. I just asked if she wanted to go see the animals and she flipped out." He patted her back as that was all he could reach as she dug herself into my shoulder, "Sorry, baby girl."

I threw a small smile at Emmett and responded, "it's okay. We're okay now, right Lilly?"

I shrugged my shoulder to try to get her to look up and slowly she turned to glance at him and the crowd with a lopsided glare.

"It's okay, baby girl. I'm right here. Can you give Uncle Em a kiss," I whispered against her head.

I took a small step forward and she watched me warily as we moved towards my larger brother. When we were standing almost chest to chest, Lilly leaned over to give him a kiss.

"Good girl," I praised.

Slowly, the crowd dissipated, but I had a one year old clutching onto my neck with all of her strength.

"Do you want to go say hi to the sheep," I asked her as I pointed towards the petting zoo.

She looked over at the fence and shook her head slightly.

"Do you want to pet the baby piggies," I asked next. No response.

I inched across the lawn towards the animals. She lifted her head slightly so she could watch my movements. When she realized my intention, her body stiffened again, but I stopped to comfort her. "Shhh, baby girl. They won't hurt."

The animal keeper was nice enough to hand me one of the tiny piglets over the fence. I had to keep a strong grasp on the wriggly animal to keep it from slipping away.

At first Lilly stiffened and pulled away from where the tiny piglet was clutched in my right arm, but as she realized that he was no more than a wiggly worm, she started to giggle. She never touched the piglet, but that was okay. We made progress today.

I gently handed the pig back to the woman inside the fence and walked away to find the next activity.

I hadn't eaten all day, so I walked into the food tent and grabbed a few cubes of cheese and a turkey sandwich onto a plate.

Unable to eat with a hand occupied by Lilly and another with my plate, I was forced to sit down with her in my lap. Victoria and James soon joined me.

I was surprised to see them holding hands.

They watched silently for a moment as I fed Lilly a cheese cube between bites of my sandwich.

"You're really good with her," Victoria said softly.

I smiled and shrugged, "She's my life."

We discussed briefly my petition to obtain guardianship then hopefully adopt the baby girl, but mainly we tried to keep the conversation light. It was a party after all.

I learned that James and Victoria had been together for three years, they had met before on previous custody and child services cases that they worked on together. She wanted to be married and adopt a child herself, but probably an older one.

She had worked with so many children who had been tossed aside just because of their age that still wanted and needed love and a caring home. Most of them acted out because they didn't have stable homes or families.

I nodded in understanding, having seen it myself in my siblings as I grew up.

We cut cake and I began to relax as I spoke with some of my father's and my colleagues from the hospitals and neighbors that I hadn't seen since I grew out of my parent's house.

As dusk set, Lilly slept in my arms as we said farewell to the rest of the guests who were leaving.

It wasn't until late that evening, long after I had settled Lilly into her crib that we all gathered in exhaustion around the family room.

My father looked at me and said, "Today was a milestone, Edward. Remember it."

I nodded, "Her first birthday."

My mother smiled patiently and responded, "Yes, today was her first birthday and that is always an important day, but more than that everyone that was there today knows that you are where she belongs, sweetheart. She showed them all that she loves you and you are her father in the most important meaning of the word."

I flushed slightly and shrugged, "I did get to speak to Victoria briefly about guardianship today. She said she would make a note in her chart about how she is loved here and she will make every attempt to keep her here."

"You know we love you, Edward, but that little girl needs you," Rosalie spoke up.

"Whatever you need, little brother," Alice chimed in, "Just let us know."

"Yeah," Emmett said, "As long as there are no petting zoos in the area, we are more than happy to help babysit when you have an overnight shift or have any overnight 'guests."

I rolled my eyes at my brother's implication, but I understood the meaning.

I always knew that I had a wonderful family that loved me, but the people that have surrounded me in life will always support me as I would for them if they needed it.


End file.
